Feeling Weary? Need some inspiration? This is where I am today...

When I went to bed last night, I had no intention of writing a blog today.  Yet after the night and morning I had, I felt it was a good idea...

Poor Joy Joy wasn't feeling well yesterday.  She had just come off a low-grade temperature the day before and seemed to be recovering until she started yelling.... and yelling.  Poor girl was in pain but I did not know how much.  I tried appropriate medicines we had at home as well as just helping her to relax.  I distracted her and tried to help her rest.  As the day progressed, it seemed she was handling things okay so I sent her to bed on the futon near me just to make sure.  Unfortunately the night did not go well... at all.  By 8 am, I was beyond frustrated and was more sure than ever my sweet girl had an ear infection.  Her fever had broken 24 hours before but she just could not sleep and kept pointing to her ear.  She was not letting up.  

Unfortunately, it took longer than we would like to get out of the house, even with the hospital a few minutes away.  Fortunately for us, the ER seemed to be ready for all the moms with kiddos as they brought the families in to triage and into a bed in the hall or room near the front rather quickly.  At first I was a little peeved but then realized with the pain Joy seemed to be experiencing this may be working to our advantage.  The doctor on duty met with the family nearest to us for a little bit, argued with the parent briefly about how important it was for the child to find a way to get their child to take the medicine, repeated "virus everyone has right now" multiple times and zoomed on over to us.  He double checked what we were there for, checked her ear, confirmed the ear infection after inspection (as well as the other for good measure), told me what he was prescribing and zoomed off.  Not 5 minutes later, we had discharge instructions and a few signatures later we were on our way to Costco for her medicine.  Arriving at the pharmacy, I realized things might take a little longer with her new insurance card and a tech being trained but I sat with my sweet girl while Micah hovered around nearby smiling and being silly.  These things seemed to help at least a little bit.  Then, we headed for the car and before long, she had the medicine in her system and a quick visit to Daddy and stop for orange juice and we were home.... and now she is sleeping.

It was noon when we arrived home.  I hadn't eaten anything and I was overwhelmed by messages to read and respond to.  I am supposed to be on a high carb diet for a few days prior to my 3 hr glucose test coming up Monday so clearly I got a late start on that for the day.  It will happen.  I hopefully won't feel so weak or tired much longer.  I am praying tonight will be much more restful in this house tonight... for all of this.  And even after all of this, I just want to encourage all of you parents out there, all of my friends and others who are struggling with anything today... 

         ...find peace in our Lord, find solace in His comfort, find a minute or two at least just to breathe today and take this day in before it ends.  We have NO idea what tomorrow will bring but it is definitely okay to not be okay all of the time and to take things as they come, in stride, as you are able.  I hope this can be a comfort to some of you today. 

I saw a pretty cool image today as I was searching through things online that said the following, 

"When your troubles try to drag you down remember that you were made to soar." 

When you're ready, revel in that, my friend and take it to heart.  

                "But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." (Isaiah 40:31, NIV)

I need to eat some more and hopefully feel a little better.  I can't wait to continue to share with you more as I keep exploring the direction for this year for my family and how God can use me.

As always,

Melis

P.S. If you do pray, I ask for your prayers today as I am especially worn and weary today and we have another long day at home while my sweet hubby works a 12 hour shift to provide for us.

1st day of High Carbin' it up & My 1st Giveaway EVER!

How have you all been doing?  Once again, I was hit with what to talk to you about.  It isn't that there isn't anything to talk about, it is that I often don't see what I have to say as important to others.  Does anyone else struggle with this?  I often get so caught up in the BIG posts that I forget that being real is what got me going in the first place... and it is what keeps me going and writing day in and day out.

I have a sick kiddo around here again.  I love her to pieces so I feel bad for her.  Yesterday, she would barely move or eat.  She told me she had a sore throat and he had a high temp as well.  So today she gets to stay home from school.  Fortunately, last night went better than the last and the kids enjoyed the "family sleepover" in our bedroom.  Today, she is starting to act like herself so we might attempt some homework!  ;-)

And we did do our maternity shoot on Monday with the fabulous Sara Story!  I so wish I had a website or Facebook for her but as far as I know, she is only reachable by phone at the moment.  Anyway, she was amazing & she IS amazing!  I was having a truly rough and grumpy day, feeling defeated and no where near confident.  I was irritated because I forgot to deal with my nails and I didn't have accessories and this one time I was doing something special, I couldn't get it together.  I was complaining about hubby not getting me or supporting me like I wanted and so on... and my mood didn't get any better when we were in not one but TWO near car accidents on the freeway on our hour drive there.  Thankfully, hubby was driving and saw both coming and was able to just avoid both cars who decided to back up or move over WITHOUT looking while driving.  (And for the record, hubby is plenty supportive.  I was being nit picky & whiny.)  

Sara made us feel at ease.  She picked a place that she loved and knew.  (She only lives in the area 6 months out of the year.)  She had me do things I didn't understand but I totally submitted to her wishes.  She asked what I was thinking and even warned me when we were down to a few photos left to shoot so we didn't miss anything important.  (TWO key things here: She shoots in ALL film & I am getting a photo with our beloved angel bears, as well as Baby Girl's.)  She was also so great with Micah.  He is usually in a fabulous mood when cameras around but he was just getting over a bug.  It looks like she got some great action shots.  So... I am DEFINITELY looking forward to getting those back!

On another note, today is the first of three days where I am on a High Carb diet via my OBGYN's instructions.  I failed my first glucose test by one point so I take the 3 hour one to rule out or in Gestational Diabetes on Monday.  I am still not sure how I feel about the crazy carb load but I am following directions as I trust my doctor and know that he has mine and baby girl's best interests in mind.  I have to do this for 3 meals for 3 days leading up to the test before a 12 hour fast immediately before it.  I have struggled so much with lack of appetite and nausea during this pregnancy, as well as preferring my protein like crazy so prayers would be appreciated!

And on to the latest news...  Have you seen my blog count?  This is post 98.  That's right.  I am only 2 posts away from 100!  Looking over at my Facebook Coach & like page this morning, I realized I am only 22 likes from 100 there.  SO... to Celebrate these milestones, I am doing my First Ever Giveaway!  I am pretty excited about it!

http://www.giveawaytab.com/mob.php?pageid=518921921574172

So go there & enter, okay? And share with your friends!  And if you have any thoughts on what you would love to read on here or see on my page, let me know!  I would love to get your input!   Watch for posts 99 & 1oo as we get closer...

As always,

Melis

P.S. I wanted to share this totally so table photo of Micah & Abby last night passed out shortly before David came home.

Super Cool News!

So I wasn't planning on a blog but I decided I might as well since I read pretty much the coolest news EVER yesterday....

My older brother proposed to his amazingly wonderful girlfriend last night and she said, "YES!"  I am stoked beyond stoked as this girl is one of those girls everyone wants to have in their family!  And I am beyond excited to share this news!  

So that's it! Haha.  Stoked for you, Matt & Elaine!  Thanks for getting those pics ;-)

As always,

Melis

Baby Bump Update ~ 3rd Trimester, Here We Come!

I guess it's just a 2-fer day, 2 blogs for the "price" of one!  I realized I had not done a true update on this little girl in my belly in a few weeks and thought I might as well do one while I am thinking of it.  So here goes...

I am 27 weeks, 3 days today.  According to some sources, I am in the 3rd trimester!  According to others, I will not be until I turn 28 weeks on Tuesday... Whatever!

According to Babycenter.com at 27 weeks, she weighs just shy of 2 lbs and at 28 weeks, she weight 2.25 lbs.  At our 20 week ultrasound, she was about a week ahead in most areas, so do the math? 

That would also mean she is between 14.5-14.8 inches.  Again, it is anyone's guess!

David felt her kick as early as 20 weeks but in the past week or so finally felt her "hiccup" repeatedly.  He definitely looked like he enjoyed it ;-)

Her big sister is SO excited for her to make it into this world this spring and her brother no longer denies her existence.  Both kiddos hug & kiss her before going to bed most nights, a tradition their Daddy taught them and they have kept up.

I am still nauseous, in pain and fatigued but I do have some things that now help with those symptoms, making this pregnancy a bit more bearable.

We have maternity/family photos coming up next week, as well as a tentative weekend planned for newborn photos.  This child will be heavily photographed and possibly best dressed ;-)

At this point in pregnancy, several decisions have been made, some shared, some not so much.  There is not going to be a baby shower, but we hope to have an "after party" when she is a few weeks old to drop-in and meet her if you would like.  We have an approximate date of induction (if needed) due to medical issues related to my clotting disorder and the medicine I am on for that.  She has a name (first & middle locked down)... and no, you cannot change it.  It has specific reasons for being her name and we have no intentions of entertaining any other ideas.  Thank you for understanding.  

Oh yeah, and we have not decided if a 4th will be added to this brood... too soon to tell!

Here is the most recent photo, taken on Monday at 26 weeks, 6 days ~ 

Wanna play a game?  I set up a baby pool if you want to guess when she will arrive, as well as some of her details... Click here ---> http://www.babyhunch.com/poolpage.php?poolid=e8bf073395974353ee8ad22df0e424d0  <---I even have a gift for the winner in mind!

Want to know anything else?  Feel free to ask & see if I have the answer!  Ready for this little girl to hurry up and be full term and come already! ;-)

As always,
Melis

What About This Week!

I've been meaning to write for days but made up plenty of excuses why each time I thought about it was the wrong time.  I might have been in a bad mood or I didn't know what to write or I was about to fall asleep or... fill in the blank!  So today I am writing.

It has been a strange-ish week around here. My kiddos hadn't been sick in ages but sure enough, Joy started coming down with something Monday, on her home school day so we put her to bed early with only half of her homework done and prayed for the best.  She coughed and coughed despite the medicine her sweet Daddy gave her so we opted to keep her home from school for the first time this school year on Tuesday.  Tuesday we had hoped she would perk up and feel better.  Sure enough, she got her homework finished but she was tired and dragged a bit... and as soon as nighttime hit, the coughing was back.  So her sweet Daddy took her temp... 99.8, borderline and gave her medicine again.  By early morning her temp was down a little but we wanted to make sure she was really feeling better, so we kept her home one more day on Wednesday.  Sure enough, she followed me to my OB appt with their office knowing ahead of time she was getting over something and she didn't cough at all from 8am-3pm.  She didn't blow her nose either. And when nighttime came she coughed only a few times and slept the rest of the night through.  She was thrilled of course, when her Daddy woke her up to go on a special field trip with her school Thursday.  I heart grand stories last night and received a very smiley girl, happy to be alive!  So today she went back to school and Micah and I are currently taking it easy and being buddies today :-D

Because of Joy being sick, I canceled most of my plans for the week which was probably good because the new medicine I am on for nausea is currently knocking me out or at least leaving me super drowsy while I adjust to it.  I was however able to see a good friend and talk plans and dreams with life and business which was a nice way to start my day today.  I am enjoying meeting new friends with common bonds through a pregnancy Facebook group and am learning that there is life even during the hardest pregnancy and there will be life afterwards.  The struggles we go through often feel as through we're barely keeping our heads above the water but often teach us so much and give us opportunities we never would have had otherwise.  I am feeling less down than I was earlier in the week and am looking forward to what this weekend and next week brings!

How about you?  What are you looking forward to?  What are you enjoying now?

As always,

Melis

Let it go? Let God have it!!!

So it has been a few days since I last posted.  You may have noticed I missed days 11 & 12 after Christmas.  I apologize for that.  All WAS going smoothly but during the craziness of this past week, I fell asleep early that night and then decided to let a few days pass and linger on what was on my mind and heart.  And boy is God teaching me things!

Have you ever gotten really upset about something?  Really upset?  Maybe it only seemed mildly frustrating initially but the more the situation progressed and the more you lingered on it, the angrier and/or sadder you became?  And other circumstances might have tended to cloud your view making it that much harder?  That is where I am... or was.  After a week where I was on a continual "high" setting goals and planning for 2015, a little piece of news brought my world crashing down.  I cried.  And then I cried some more.  And then when I thought I had found a resolution and moved on, something else changed the situation and I became kind of angry.  I got really upset, offended, hurt... you name it.  In fact, I devoted an entire day to my frustration.  I vented and talked it out.  I was on the verge of tears yet again.  I talked to people who agreed with me.  I did some research and I tried to make myself feel better.  But at no time in this process did I let it go.  I did not bring it to God...

So today, I am going to do one final list.  I am going to double check a few numbers, names and then pray the heck through it all!  That's right.  And then... then I am going to surrender it to God and let a decision be made, today or in the next few days.  From there, it is God's leading and not mine.  I will not manipulate or mess with any person or part of the situation.  I will just let it be and let God have it.

Yep, that's where I am.
Talk to you later.

As always,
Melis

The 12 Days After Christmas ~ Day 10 ~ Making Progress

Can you believe we're on Day 10 already?  It feels like time is suddenly flying by.  My oldest, my sweet Joy Joy goes back to school this week.  I'll be driving more again but at least the routine will come more naturally to us.  Tomorrow is David's day off.  I have my glucose tolerance test... bleh.  I get to meet up with a good friend though.  And get this... I might just get a nap... maybe.

Today I woke up thoroughly exhausted.  (I am noticing a trend.)  I headed out for coffee and was amazed to realize when I got back how motivated I was.  You know what?  I am working on a website.  I am super excited about it too.  I have wanted to do this for a long time but have not had the drive or determination to get it going and keep it up.  I finally think I am in the right place to do it though.  It is in the VERY earliest stages so not published yet but I am excited as to how it is shaping up.  I will let you know when it is up!

I also worked a little bit on my challenge group starting up tomorrow... New Year, New You ~ 21 Days to Reset & Restart ~ https://www.facebook.com/groups/newyearreset/  <--- Click to join!  I am excited about the tips and motivation I have to share with you.  I feel so blessed at all that I have learned during this past year despite its ups and downs.

I am reminded over and over about how just because you wake up feeling iffy does not mean your day has to continue or end that way.  YOU do have some power.  You can CHOOSE to better your day even if you are tired or not feeling well.  You cannot choose what happens to you but you can choose how to react to it and how to interact with those that you encounter.  Anyway you look at it, you're blessed.  God has put you on this earth for a reason and I am glad you are here!

As always,
Melis

Day 9 ~ The 12 Days After Christmas ~ Off day, anyone?

So glad to have my family...
  They're pretty good at adapting. This motivated mommy was not feeling well today. Still am not. Guessing it's primarily a combo of pregnancy discomforts.  After my last appt on Monday I was doing pretty well and it was nice to know that I had the backups to help manage pain and nausea and help me sleep as needed. However,  after attempting to go to bed early last night and failing,  I woke up beyond exhausted and sore, despite the fact that it appeared I got more than 10 hours of sleep. Oh the joys of pregnancy. 

With around 3 months to go, my kids adapted well to my basic menu for meals and lack of organization for the day. I even got a 20 minute nap. While I realize some of these things are unavoidable until our little princess arrives, I am thankful for my kiddos on my off days... because who doesn't have off days?

Tomorrow will be a new day. We'll go to church and spend some time together and celebrate the fact that David will be off the following day... finally.  I am looking forward to pressing on and working through these days. They're apart of the journey after all.

As always,
Melis

Coming back to my WHY... (12 Days After Christmas ~ Day 8)

"I'm sorry.  There's no heartbeat."

There are no words to express exactly what flooded my mind or heart right then.  But there was hurt and confusion and the realization that I was one of them, those women who would have a baby pass in my womb with no warning whatsoever.  What followed was a bit of a blur.  There was a hospital visit, pain, crying, waiting and phone calls... and a lot of wondering.

But still, only months after that horrible news we were pregnant again.  And just before Mother's Day.  We were ecstatic but cautious.  We were given the impression this happens to people, families... Even my doctor seemed confident.  Until that day in July when we received the news yet again,  This time I insisted on an immediate ultrasound and attention.  And we were there again.  My doctor was to be out of town for the following 2 weeks but assured me we would run tests, check in etc. when he was back,  He did not however seem confident this would yield any results but maybe...

5 days later I was recovering when I had the absolute worst pain my chest I had ever had in my life.  I just could not catch a breath.  Hubby insisted we go to the hospital.  Three and a half hours after entering the ER, I was finally seen.  Two hours later I was informed that I had a pulmonary embolism and would be admitted... on our wedding anniversary.  Hubby was in shock and my kids were not happy Mommy was not coming home.  I had a strange feeling of relief and sadness all mixed in.

But while there I was enlightened.  I had a clotting disorder called Factor V Leiden.  It was most likely the reason my babies only made it to 13-14 & 15 weeks since that is around when the placenta was taking over.  My blood just kept clotting and they couldn't get what they needed.  And I was released four days later on Lovenox and Coumadin.  I was able to stop Lovenox is less than 2 weeks.  For the next 6 months, I took Coumadin daily to shrink and ultimately get rid of the clot in my lungs.  Additionally, I had blood draw after blood draw, sometimes 3 times a week just to get my INR in the therapeutic range. I was also on Norco for pain.  I thought this would be short lived but soon learned that the pain never would fully go away until the clot did.  I rarely knew why some weeks were so much harder but I trusted that this part of the journey would likely be short term in the grand scheme of things.  These things were just apart of it.  Ultimately, I needed to accept that.

Well, it did pass.  What started on a day that was so celebratory ended on a day that truly was celebratory, my Daddy's birthday.  I was given the all clear.  There was no clot and I could go off of the Coumadin for good as long as no blood clot emerged again.  I was instructed by my hematologist to start on aspirin and ultimately stay on it for life.  He also reminded us that we likely could have a baby again but would need to switch to Lovenox for the duration.  We agreed... and I felt a sense of relief.  Suddenly life was about more than surviving.  It took me some time but I ultimately fell into a rhythm, started P90X3 and really started learning about what it was going to take to be healthy again.  I could not focus solely on having a baby but needed to see the bigger picture for my family.

I lost 25 lbs during the next 6 months.  Shortly after being cleared by my doctor, I signed up as a Beachbody Coach and then sat back and watched and took it all in.  By summer of 2014, I was not only a healthy weight but I was running again, swimming again and all around feeling great.  I had found my love of being healthy for not just my family but for me.  I was less dependent on others for my own happiness.  And then the miracle happened...

We found out we were pregnant.  We were thrilled but scared out of our minds.  This was the ultimate test,  We saw our hopes wrapped up in this rainbow baby.  For the first 16 weeks of my pregnancy, I was practically a shell again.  I was nervous and teary and exhausted too.  I threw up frequently.  I was sore early on and there were days I could barely get out of bed.  Each ultrasound David and I attended together pensive but hoping.  And when we saw her at 16 weeks moving up a storm, something clicked again.  

I was reminded that this beautiful rainbow baby girl was not our only miracle.  Given my clotting disorder, both Joy and Micah are miracles as well.  And all of that time we spent surviving the near-death experience and loss of our two angels was worth it, even if the pain was horrific.  You see, I did not start working out for fun.  (Seriously?)  I did not join Beachbody as a coach to just bring in money (although the prospect of it doesn't hurt).  I started doing all of this because I wanted to honor the memory of my babies, Squirt and Little One.  I wanted to be the healthy, fit mommy for my children that are here.  I wanted to be the independent, silly, fun-spirited girl my husband met in middle school and ultimately fell for in college.  I wanted life again.  I wanted to live my calling.  If wanted to honor God with everything I did.  I did not want to be a shell or a piece of anything... I wanted to be GENUINE... and real.  

This is why I became a Beachbody coach.  I have an amazing team I am apart of and I hope to be able to bring some of you on with me.  I don't think I ever saw myself as special or unique.  I was "normal" if you can say that, even average.  My goals are so huge now and I am determined to make some things happen this year.  So as far as this year... I am going to LIVE ~ INTENTIONALly & GENUINE.  I want to help get David home more this year as well and move out of this apartment.  This is what I know so far.  If you have any questions or want to know more, feel free to comment or message me, or click on that cool new bar at the top of this blog ;-)  I am starting a new group this Monday, January 5th to help start fresh, stop looking back and move forward.  I am here to just chat too :-D  That's all for now.

As always,
Melis

P.S. If you are counting, we are now about 3.5 months left until baby girl is due!  And there are some updates coming on her and our plans in the next week or so... stay tuned!

So you decided to sit in on a call with John Maxwell... (12 Days After Christmas ~ Day 7)

In February of this past year, I decided to take the plunge.  I fell in love with Beachbody products and I knew they worked.  I was looking for a way to at least supplement my husband's income so that we could relax some, breathe.  So with the help of a friend and fellow coach, I joined and started watching people on my team and what they did and tried to get an idea of their success.  I continued P90X3 when I wasn't injured (and to some extent when I was) and eventually found a way to balance food and exercise and then it just started to click.  I was excited.  I ran my first challenge group and I saw potential in others, in other people that had something in common with me but were each their own person as well.  I sold a few programs and realized that if I continued to learn and continued to express what was in my heart that this could be a winning combination for me.  

And I still believe it.  Even though the surprise roller coaster of this pregnancy took some time to adjust to, I still believe it.  And here I am 10.5 months in, and I want to make this year the best one yet.  And I know people say it all the time but this year... it is definitely going to be different for me as a person and for my family.  I am going to LIVE this year and I am going to be INTENTIONAL about it.  Now, I did not want to be a hypocrite day one of the New Year.  (I mean, who does?)  One of the great parts of coaching with Beachbody is being on a team.  On our team Facebook group, someone chimed in and reminded us about the call with John Maxwell... yes, you read that right.  Today, at 10am PST, Traci Morrow's entire team was invited on to a call with him.  On a personal level, this is likely the closest I have ever been to starstruck.  I know who this guy is.  I've heard about him over and over growing up.  And through some kind of cool God thing only he could orchestrate, when dozens of us moved from one team to another (which only happens for certain reasons), I ended up in Traci Morrow's downline, who has been mentored the past 2 years by John Maxwell.  For those of you who don't know who Traci Morrow is, she's one kickass amazing woman and a Founding Coach of Beachbody.  And she's a woman of faith which I absolutely LOVE!  Ever done P90X or P90X3? You've seen her.  Let's just say there isn't a better team to be on...

So today, I jumped on the call she hosted with John Maxwell, determined to start my year off right.  If I am going to claim to LIVE this year and make key decisions, I need to be INTENTIONAL.  And that is the very first thing I got from what John Maxwell said.  So this month, I plan to break down what it will mean to LIVE, sort of like mini resolutions or key tenants to making this year the best one yet.  The first part is about being INTENTIONAL.  (Have you got that?)  Keep in mind you can't move forward if you are not looking forward and living where you are, where you are going.  If you are looking backwards, how can you move forward??  Maybe better said by John Maxwell, "Don't look back.  You're not going that way (anymore).  2014 is past.  It's behind you." 

When Traci closed out the call, she quoted him as well on the subject of intentionality.  "Lots of people have good intentions but they don't have intentionality."  Something to think about... So what did you do today?  Clearly, I have got some things to work on.  While you're thinking about that, go ahead and sign up for my "New Year, New You" group on Facebook ~ 3 weeks, 21 tips... Let's just get going in the right direction, okay? https://www.facebook.com/groups/newyearreset/

I am stoked to be on this journey with you and help you in any way I can.  I am here to chat with you online or on the phone, by e-mail... I am totally and completely a work in progress and I am loving what I am starting to see emerge.  

"You cannot give what you do not have." ~ John Maxwell  

Want to be built into this year?  Let me know.  I am pretty excited to see what is to come...

As always, 

Melis